Men’s mental health is a topic that often remains in the shadows, negated by stigma and societal expectations. This can prevent men from prioritizing their well-being and seeking the support they need.
To shed light on this important issue, I spoke with Demetrios Marousis, MA, MBA, LPC, director of behavioral health for Highmark Health. Together, we'll explore the unique challenges men face, how to recognize the signs of struggle, and what resources are available. But first, we’ll share a short video from health plan member, Rich, who shares his personal journey of overcoming grief and finding support through Mental Well-Being Powered by Spring Health.
Rich Serna: I started using the mental well-being after the recent loss of a loved one. It was actually a dog that we had rescued. There was just something different about him that uh I felt like I was cheated with my time with him because we only had him for like three plus years because he was older.
He just fit right in and um he's like the sweetest creature that I've ever met in my life.
This time it was taking a toll on me where I didn't, I haven't felt like that in a while.
It almost felt like a family member had passed away and um I needed to do something.
People at work noticed that I wasn't myself. I got connected through the mental um well-being program through a colleague at work.
She goes, "Hey, do you know our insurance has this program and it's like wonderful." and I've been, you know, using it over time.
I just decided to try it.
You can do it from your iPhone and sit there for your lunch talking for your session.
Everybody's busy nowadays, but of course you have to make time if you're serious about that too.
It's been um just nothing but great things ever since she connected me with that.
I started to feel just, you know, gradually a little better by listening to them, having your mind clear.
So you're not just like thinking about that event all the time or having it like, oh, the weight, you know, weighing you down or making you feel sad.
I'm very fortunate that my insurance provides this.
There are no words. It's, it's basically, I think it's priceless.
I cherished every day um that we've had with him.
We've taken our dogs on so many trips to Colorado.
We took them to the White Sox games and um breweries with us up in Michigan and I just think that he enjoyed the life and um he just liked being around us.
I think anybody who has the ability to talk to somebody, to see a specialist or with mental being that they should do it.
Throw out all the stuff that you've heard in the past or the stereotypes and just take the first step.
You can be connected with somebody and you'll be amazed.
After a pet's death triggered unexpected grief, 45-year-old Rich turned to Mental Well-Being, accessible through his health insurance. He quickly found a therapist via the platform and began virtual sessions, which provided invaluable support in processing his grief and managing other life stressors. Rich experienced significant improvements in mental clarity and overall well-being and still leverages the program nearly a year later.
Catherine Clements: What are some of the biggest societal hurdles that prevent men from prioritizing their mental health and seeking needed support?
Demetrios Marousis: The biggest obstacle is the stigma surrounding men's mental health. Because it's not discussed openly enough, many men don't prioritize or even recognize their needs. They tend to disregard their emotions to “get the job done,” and they may feel bound to outdated societal expectations that equate vulnerability with weakness. To make matters worse, men can lack role models who can provide guidance and a framework for handling difficult situations. Overcoming this stigma and lack of support is crucial to encouraging men to seek help when they need it, rather than struggling in silence.
Catherine Clements: I love your point about role models. We don’t often see examples of someone who went to therapy and finished treatment. Why are mental health conditions viewed so differently than physical health conditions?
Demetrios Marousis: There's often an invisible barrier when it comes to mental health. Unlike a readily identifiable physical condition, mental health issues can be difficult to label and accept as part of oneself. The fear of having it confirmed is worse than not knowing for many people. This is unlike physical illnesses.
For example, someone with asthma can exercise and manage their condition by understanding the symptoms and seeking treatment. Similarly, someone with diabetes can manage their condition by taking medication, monitoring their numbers, and understanding their body's performance.
However, mental health issues are often viewed negatively, as something that diminishes a person, which shouldn't be the case. If you can label it as a mental health challenge, you're more likely to pursue a mental health solution, actively manage it and experience remission of symptoms in many instances.
Catherine Clements: Are there ways that mental health conditions might look different in men compared to women? What are some signs that someone might be struggling?
Demetrios Marousis: Across genders, depression and anxiety are the top two mental health conditions. However, if we were to look at some stereotypical views, men may have more outward behavioral manifestations of those conditions. With men, you're more likely to see symptoms of anxiety and depression as anger, a shorter fuse, or being quiet. Further on the mental health continuum may be the use of substances to temper the symptoms or mask yourself from thoughts and feelings.
These symptoms aren’t exclusive to men but are born out of typical presentations. There are fewer shared experiences and support with men, unlike women who typically can nurture connections, support and friendships easier.
Catherine Clements: Can you describe the mental health spectrum, from feeling okay to facing significant challenges? At what point should people consider seeking support from a counselor or psychotherapist?
Demetrios Marousis: Mental health exists on a continuum. It's not about achieving a state of “perfect” mental health but rather recognizing that there will be good days and less good days. The key is to assess your level of functioning and the effort it takes to maintain that level. How much of your mental energy are you using? It’s about your capacity to manage your environment and the stressors within it.
Stress, major life changes, and even early childhood experiences can all impact your mental well-being as an adult. Many people develop coping strategies to overcome challenges, but those strategies may have limits or need to be addressed later in life. This is because our bodies, minds, situations, resources, and responsibilities are constantly changing.
These changes can bring concerns about finances, loneliness, caretaking and a lack of connectivity with others to the forefront. Many men report feeling disconnected and lacking a space to share their experiences, concerns, and even doubts about their abilities. Where can they talk about the challenges of raising teenagers or their fears about not being good enough? When these kinds of questions start to affect your day-to-day functioning, it may be time to seek help.
Catherine Clements: Can you describe the different levels of mental health care available, from self-care strategies to higher levels of clinical intervention?
Demetrios Marousis: Absolutely. The spectrum starts with self-care, which involves activities that help you relax and center yourself. These can include reading, walking, hiking, mindfulness exercises, meditation, massage, hobbies, sleeping well or simply taking time alone. The key is to prioritize your well-being, recognizing that you're better equipped to help others when you take care of yourself first. Think of the oxygen mask analogy on an airplane: put yours on first.
Beyond self-care, there are formal treatments through outpatient therapy, which now involves focused, evidence-based practices that can produce noticeable improvements within a few sessions. Therapy isn't always a permanent fix, but it can provide strategies to manage symptoms of depression, anxiety, or general unease. Medication can also be helpful, particularly for biologically driven mental health conditions. However, it's most effective when combined with therapy. It's important to work closely with your doctor to understand potential side effects and expected outcomes, as medications often take time to work and finding the right one may require some adjustments.
Finally, there are higher levels of care for more acute expressions of mental illness, including intensive outpatient programs, partial hospitalization programs, and, in cases where there's a risk to oneself or others, inpatient hospitalization. These options are designed to stabilize individuals and help them transition back to functioning in the community.
Catherine Clements: What mental health resources available to Highmark members? Why should members trust these resources over self-serve options?
Demetrios Marousis: As a health plan, Highmark is deeply invested in keeping our members healthy and providing the right level of care. We have built a network of accessible providers to serve our members across the mental health care continuum. We encourage members to reach out to us for assistance in finding a provider.
Through Mental Well-Being Powered by Spring Health, health plan members can schedule an in-person or virtual mental behavioral health appointment within days. The program matches members to providers who are most likely to meet their needs, considering a host of consumer preferences like gender, specialty, ethnicity, etc. to ensure a good fit. We’re seeing positive impacts with Spring Health’s measurement-based care approach. On average, members with depression and anxiety move into remission in less than six sessions.
In addition to therapy, Mental Well-Being includes educational programs, self-guided cognitive behavioral therapy programs for issues such as stress, meditation programs and behavioral health coaching. It also offers medication management, 24/7 crisis support and higher levels of specialized care for substance use disorders, eating disorders and other complex challenges.
As a health plan, we also offers case management resources staffed by licensed mental health clinicians to help members locate and fully access their behavioral health benefits. This team can help connect you to care and manage the nuances of your clinical needs.
"Remember, when it comes to mental health, you don't have to do it alone. Strength doesn't preclude vulnerability."
– Demetrios Marousis
Catherine Clements: Let's explore some practical ways to support a man in your life who may be struggling.
Demetrios Marousis: Many people try to be supportive, but prematurely labeling someone as having “mental health issues” can backfire due to stigma. Instead of saying, “you need to work on your mental health,” try to identify specific struggles you're noticing. For example, “I've noticed it's harder for you to do [specific task]” or “I see you're working hard on [specific thing], and I'm not sure you're able to do it without support.”
Avoid lay diagnoses like, “I think you're depressed,” as this can trigger defensiveness. Instead, offer information and resources by saying something like, “Depression often shows up as a change in appetite, weight, sleep patterns, or irritability.” Focus on functional pieces that can be adjusted, rather than applying a broad label. It can also be helpful to acknowledge that current interactions aren't working and suggest seeking help together, emphasizing that it's a common issue.
Catherine Clements: What's a key takeaway you'd want men to remember about navigating their mental health?
Demetrios Marousis: Engage in constant self-exploration. Try to understand the origins of your thoughts and feelings. Know the limits of your own resources, and if you lack a trusted peer group, remember that strength doesn't preclude vulnerability or less-than-ideal days. It's about how you respond and adjust to those things. Remember that help is available, you don't have to do it alone. Even if you thought you'd dealt with past experiences from childhood, the military, relationships, or jobs, they can still resurface. Being triggered doesn't mean you're weak, it simply means you have a memory.
By: Catherine Clements and David Flora
Originally Posted: June 18, 2025 on Highmark Health
This article was first published in Highmark Health Digital Magazine and is used with permission.
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